Friday, May 26, 2006

What's wrong with people?

OK, I know I'm getting off topic lately, but this really pisses me off. Today, the Capitol Police closed down the Rayburn building for five hours and Capitol Hill overall for part of that time. Why? Because someone called the police and reported that they thought they heard gunshots in the Rayburn garage.

Now today when I went to lunch, I saw on the TV the CNN reporters jabbering away inanely lunging for anything sensational to attract the viewers attention and I'll admit that for the first few minutes, I fell for it. Then I heard two key clues; the only thing they were going on is the one call and there was construction work in the garage. At that moment, I knew that this was all just a waist of time, some dumbass heard a hammer drill or concrete nail gun (which is actually a gunshot) and shit his/her pants, called the police and several hundreds of thousands if not millions of dollars went to waist.

I can believe that some dumbass office worker who has never done an honest day's labor in their life would mistake normal construction noise for gunshots, what gets me is the response? Hey! I know, send a couple of guys to check this shit out before you go all commando and close down Capitol Hill and bring in the FBI HRT team to take down all the hostiles. Methinks someone is watching too much 24 lately and fancies himself a Jack Bauer. You and I are working damn hard to pay for all this shit and its being pissed away chasing down noises and not actuall bad people!

So I guess to be a part of the solution, I'll post some tips for the many many dumbass office workers out there.

  1. Know what a God Damned gunshot sounds like! You can do this buy going to a range and shooting one.
  2. Don't assume what sounds like gunfire actually is gunfire, there are many things that sound similar that aren't
  3. Don't call the police unless you KNOW someone is threatening life with a gun, you know, see it with your own eyes, that sort of shit.
  4. Finally, if you're that God Damned scared, stay the fuck home and suck your thumb you pussy!

As for the Police

  1. Office workers are morons who don't know what guns sound like, don't listen to them when they talk about gunshots
  2. If someone calls to report shots fired, send a car, hell send three, just don't call SWAT and every cop in radio range to come and waist our money searching for something that never happened on one fucking call!
  3. Has anyone else called in? You would think in a big office building, someone else might have heard the shots too, guns are loud you know!
  4. If you get a shots fired call, make sure some shots are fired by shooting the caller and the commander

I guess its not all bad, at least Congress wasn't able to prattle on about letting illegal aliens have amnesty or how they shouldn't be subject to pesky things like felony bribery or the Constitution.



Judge Mint Day said...

While I agree with you on most parts I just want to say a few things;

1.Gunshots don’t always sound like gunshots.
2.Just because people who should have heard it didn’t hear doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.
3.There are exceptions to every rule, the real problem is that out coddled super-class aristocracy known as the House and Senate believe they ARE the exception to every case.

José Giganté said...

I suppose the underlying current of my anger is just that. The "super-class aristocracy" were treated differently. YOU know damn good and well that if shots were reportedly fired in my building that CIRT and every cop in the county wouldn't lock the campus down and do a search.

Judge Mint Day said...

No, you would get a part-time IUPD cadet with red blazer and a 1972 motorola to do a walk through!